I am a chronic pain sufferer. There is no cure for what I have. I’m not complaining about my lot in life, I simply want to tell my story.
I live every day with pain. Every single one. I have meds that can help with managing the pain but they are not magic pills. Plain and simple, they make the pain more bearable so I don’t lose my mind when the pain really, really bad. Its a life of precarious balance between not enough to relieve the edge & too much ruining my kidneys. Sometimes it’s ok, many times it’s quite a bleak sufferance. It’s something I don’t wish for anyone. Period.
There has been a trend in my life for the last year or so. I have not spoken of it, but it’s very noticeable to me. It impacts my life in a big was. And, while I didn’t know what the cause was, I have quietly worried. My worry? That there will come a time where I will not find a pharmacy to fill my meds. Nearly all Pharmacies in my area will not fill my prescription. At the moment, I am paying $75 more than I need to because it’s the only pharmacy that will fill my script and they are aware of my situation and do their best to accommodate me. They are NOT CVS.
I have a harsh point of view when it comes to people & addictions, be it Opioid, Alcohol, Diet Pepsi, Big Mac or Twinkies. If they want to kill themselves, let them. It’s harsh, I know. But here’s the thing, and all people that have addictions (mine is Diet Pepsi and that’s no lie, I about lost my mind with out it during Hurricane Harvey), the only way to over come it is to want to do so.
If you have an addiction and want my help to stop the madness, I will be the first one in line to help you. I will do everything I can to help you, give you strength, distract you from that bitter beast, and give you the shirt off my back if need be. You have to want it though. There is no chance of recovery if you don’t want to recover.
I don’t think the current “crisis” needs more education. I knew in 5th grade, that drugs were bad, prescription, recreation or a combination of the two.
I don’t want any of you to think I’m being harsh or cold, because I don’t mean it that way. But if I have to choose a life of bearable pain versus a life of pain so intense I’m almost unable to cope, then I choose me with less pain. I’ve been very close to that line that is losing reason because of pain, and let me tell you, it’s not a line, it’s a cliff.
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