Don’t look in the Mirror…

I looked in the mirror this morning and noticed that my face is much fuller than it was even a month ago. Drat! Dang that upped dosage of Lyr!c@. It seems that every pill I’m on, and I’m on many for this Fibro-Myalgia, cause weight gain. In the last two years, I’ve added 20+ pounds. I doubt I’ll get them off.

Such a source of consternation for me. I have been trying to work on my self image. I know that I’m the most critical person there is of my body and what I look like. I have been my whole life, even when I was young and thin in those cheerleading pictures. I think that this is a woman’s lot in life. Papa doesn’t understand, bless him, because men are wired differently. No worries, I’ve sworn off bagels, doughnuts & cookies for a while. I can’t swear off Brownies, papa is making a batch today.

I’ve read all of your wonderful comments. You are all so dear to me. I swear, I’ll get to each and every one of you this week. Sherry suggested a bubble bath and I could really go for that. I’ve considered remodeling my bathroom and putting in a fancy pants tub that I can actually fit in. I detest sitting in a tub where only 1/2 of my body is covered. I so want to be completely covered in a tub where I can soak for hours and hours.

There’s a thing called “Fibro Fog” and it’s a foggie version of life that happens to people with Fibro. It’s hard to cut through so that you can do anything. I’ve managed to find a way to cut through to do my work, but am having the darnedest time with other things, like following conversations and just having the brain trip and fall mid sentence. I’m still working on how to deal with it, I’ll find a way to get there, just little bits at a time.

April 18th I head out to Ft. Walton Beach at 6:30 AM in the morning. Well, I leave earlier but I’ll be picking up my friend Mary at that time. I want to get there in plenty of time for check in. I’m going to soak in the sun all week long. I can assure you that this is far better for me than anything on earth. I am seriously considering retiring in this area so that I can go to the beach several times a week.

Well, my lunch hour is over… off to resolve software bugs and write software bugs and also play office politics, too…


© Fizz 2009


About Fizz

*I'm a Northern Girl livin' in the South. *I graduated with a BS in Geophysics from Michigan Technological University (MTU). *I have critters: 2 dogs & 1 cat. *I love thunder and rain days. Too much sunshine gets on my nerves. (How I survive in Texas I do not know!) *I'm trying to remove swearing from my vocabulary (Good Luck!). *I'm the last single in my group of friends. The rest of the turn coats got married. *Sadly, the above friends are now procreating. Now the world will have yet more strange and twisted individuals that will have to go to an Engineering School to survive. *Yoopers do exist. Look on a map. *Marvin the Martian and I have a lot in common. We're both cranky when crossed and generally like our own way. *I will never be a model! (Thank god, that starvation stuff has GOT to be painful!!!). *I am not Fat! (Even though that little voice behind my right ear might tell me that every single day). *I am normal. Whatever that means! *Yes, you can be smart and not be a geek. *I've been told I'm not boring. We'll see. *Much to my irritation, I have been described as Eccentric. *I cannot spell! *Being Single is a frame of mind. *Who said life was fair?
This entry was posted in Me... Because it's all about Me!. Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Don’t look in the Mirror…

  1. Sherry says:

    Before I found out that I had an underactive thyroid I would have a foggy mind too. I just couldn’t concentrate on anything or remember what I said from one minute to the next for the life of me so I know how you feel. It’s not fun. I do wish you the best.I’d love to be sitting on the beach with you. Boy that’ sounds dreamy.HugsSherry


  2. Beth says:

    I can relate to the foggy part as I am constantly having a senior brain fart. Juli, dear, I wish you along with Ms Toodie could be free from pain. You have a wonderful time at Ft. Walton Beach! Try and forget your worries for awhile.


  3. Ann says:

    Sorry to hear about the weight gain. But glad to hear about your upcoming vacation. What a treat that will be!


  4. Dana says:

    I think when you start out pretty it’s a lifestyle. You don’t get speeding tickets, men hang on every word, and then you get older.. I am resigned to know this body just carries my spirit. My spirit is enough in itself without maintaining the pretty. It’s hard to let it go and some days are harder than others but now I’m just embacing it. Some days I really think I should lose weight and then chocolate appears in my hand almost magically! LOL I hope your fibro gets under control and don’t worry about your mind, all of us menopausal women won’t remember anything anway!


  5. Joe says:

    I know for a fact that guys think differently…imagine that coupled with the fact that my wife comes from another country and you can imagine (and maybe sometimes smile) the conversations we’ve had. Age brings changes too and there’s no fighting that. I take some comfort in the fact that what we truly are is inside us and that’s something that’s beautiful.


  6. Babblelot says:

    I hate the fog!! You described it perfectly! It’s so embarrassing for me. You have a great vacation my friend. I gained too. A treadmill maybe in my future.


  7. Shelly says:

    You are beautiful. Look at the woman in the mirror full face or thin, doesn’t matter, tell her you love and and smile and I can guarantee that she will smile back and if you believe you are beautiful the rest of the world will agree. Take care my love and keep the count down on! Wahoo BEACH!!


  8. Shelly says:

    s word = snowwe were at western michigan. xoxoxo


  9. KatSoup says:

    hi,Just checking in to see if you are playing computer surroundings. I hope you feel well enough to snap us a shot.


  10. JoAnn says:

    Reminds me – "inside of me is a skinny girl screaming to get out but I shut’er up with chocolate". I know you’re going to have a great time in Florida.


  11. Patty says:

    I know what you mean about pills and weight gain been there too. I think about when I look out my window and I still see snow and there you are in the warm sunshine but I am happy for you…Dont know but I think maybe the cold would not be good for your illness..You have a great vacation and just relax and enjoy all that sun..


Care to Comment?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s