My hypnotherapist has said that I need to let go and not let this make me a bitter b!tch. I see his point heartily, but realise that it’s so much harder to do than to actually do.
My hypnotherapist is a hoot. He was like “If I thought that there was a chance that I could throw you out this window and you not be injured and you might ACTUALLY get it… I’d do it. But, I really don’t think that I can get in thru your thick head!” The problem is, I prolly wouldn’t have.
He’s trying to get me not to dig in and be a stubborn A$$ on principle when it’s doing no good but making me upset and sick. Since I’ve ate minimally for a week, I may very well get really, really sick.
So today, I’m going to lunch by myself. I’m taking a book and heading to the steak house for some red meat and some good vegetables… broccoli. (I LOVE broccoli) And, I’ll be away from here so my life isn’t all consuming with this place. AND, if I spend money on it, I’ll likely eat it, which means my health won’t totally decline.
Will I be working as hard as I was? Nope. And… I really AM trying hard not to be a bitter b!tch because it really hurts no one but myself. It’s really, really freakin’ hard. That’s something that I would naturally do and so I have to short circuit that whole process.
And, I’ve made a few adjustments in my professional life. I’m really trying hard to have colleagues be colleagues and my friends be people that are totally separate. And, I don’t need a lot of friends in the real, I like my online buddies better… youse guys really do care about what’s going on in my life. So I’ll be investing more time in YOU! 😀 So… if you’ve seen comments on my Facebook account about divorcing, that would be what I’m doing.
OK… I’m off to do damage to my work that I have to get done. Have a marvelous Monday and to quote an old Scottish proverb: “Do your best; leave the rest. T’will all come right some day or night.”
copy Fizz 2009